Writing stories has been a passion of mine since I was 9 years old, but I didn’t really pick up on it hardcore until I was 14 years old. I would write odd short stories here and there up until then but they were really bad and not that great that I may never EVER share them with anyone cause they were just bad.
I started writing at 9 years old when I got my first notebook. Before then, I was that kid with the active imagination. I always had thoughts going through my head. And they were out of the ordinary. When I got my first notebook, I was writing little fantasy-ish stories non-stop. I was crazy! But it kinda died down when I got into Secondary School cause I knew I had to focus on my school work more than my stories.
At 13, I started to write fanfictions. The usual band fanfictions that included bands such as My Chemical Romance. And I never saw the problem with writing things like that. I still never shared them with anyone at this point. I always kept my stories to myself. And I continued to write very bad and rather cringy fanfictions when I read them back through the notebooks I used back then today.
Now, the deep stuff comes. When I was 14, my grandma died. She was the one person that meant the most to me. She always knew how much my stories meant to me. She loved to see me writing instead of typing away on my phone and when she died, I felt devastated. My stories started getting deep. They were still fanfictions, but there were lots of bad points to them, like death and mental illness, self-harming and suicide. Why did I write this? Because of the way I felt. I felt sad to have lost the most important person in my life. Writing about that stuff made me feel better. I felt like writing about suicide and self-harming made me not want to do it to myself in real life.
I also dealt with very bad bullying at my school. Anything that was said about you would never die down. It would stay with you until you left that place. And the teachers did nothing about the bullying. I would write a lot in class to help the bad feelings go away. It felt like escaping into my own little world. In my own little world, there would be no criticism. No bullying. Everyone listens to each other and helps each other. There is no devastation. No ridiculing. And I loved to escape into my very own world!
I’m proud of the box of old notebooks I now keep in my wardrobe. I loved writing in notebooks then because having a laptop with a word processor when I was a kid wasn’t really a thing. I was late being introduced to the internet, but I don’t see a problem with that. It hasn’t changed who I am today. I don’t see what the problem with 6 years of using notebooks instead of a computer is. There is nothing wrong with a bit of old fashion. Looking through some of my old notebooks at the stories I wrote makes me smile.
Now at 17 years old, I am writing about fantasy stuff again like I did at 9 years old, and I miss how fun it was to be writing fantasy. I am proud to be a writer. Writing has made me who I am today. It makes me smile when my feelings and everything going on inside the brain of mine is written down on a piece of paper or typed up on a computer. Writing gives me a voice. Writing makes my world go round!